To find oneself attractive. Confident or Arrogant? This stems into a topic I frequent. Self esteem. Self confidence.
Lets have a stab at defining them myself first.
- Self Esteem
- One's perceived own value
- Self Confidence
- One's projected value
After writing those two down I don't think it's that simple. Man... these are all such complicated interconnected topics. Confidence. Arrogance. Loving oneself. Loving others. Wanting others. Needing others. Having others. Humility. Happiness. Esteem. Lucien recently added a third spanner into the esteem/confidence works. Not sure where it fits in (or even if it is actually separate).
- Socially Percieved Value
-
for lack of a better name. The self explanatory value which reflects that even though one can have both high self esteem and self confidence, one may still consider oneself perceived less valuable in the eyes of others
I guess the first thing I would critique if I was to be reading this is my flagrant use of the word
value. My deliberately vague usage of the term brings a wry smile to my face :)
Respect. Definitely something that is incredibly valuable.
Trust. Another massively valuable asset. Yet both of these are, what I would call
compound values. Unlike
Honesty, which is an isolated value.
Integrity.
Fun.
Intelligent.
Creative.
Talented.
Enthusiastic.
My categorical skill is failing me! Us humans love to categorise, yet this post is quite the tangled web.
The name of this post is actually the name of a post that I was going to write first. My life over the past year. My
life dramatic. My
"dramatis vitae". I realised, however, that it would be an awfully long post, and would probably contain more about other people than other people would have me write ;) so bite my tongue - for now - I have.
My own journey
- Work out who I am
- Accept who I am
- Be happy with who I am
I'm still at step one with most of my life, step two with some, three with little. A big problem I've had (and still have) is that one of the things I am is
adaptable. And this trait is part of who I am, yet it conflicts with so many other traits of which also are who I am. I've said this to quite a few people - You're telling me not to change for people, but how can I do this when I'm already changing, and stopping that would be doing the very thing you're telling me not to do.
Yet even if I put down all the words I could possible - only actions have real meaning. I've been very borderline obnoxiously arrogant quite a few times to some of my closest friends recently. Sure, I could write these times off to one off events, and rationalise them, argue their legitimacy; but unless I stop acting like that, that IS who I am. You're not what you
want to be. You are who you are. Or, in the immortal words of Hogarth Hughes - You are who you chose to be.
Glenn Francis out.
